THAT is all the money I saved not buying candy or junk food in the last two weeks. It's like £45 and 10 whole pence, how bad is that? How does someone even eat that amount of candy? That's like 300 freddo bars or 102 bags of of chips or 45 and a half cheeseburgers. HA, omg. So guess whose all skinny again! (Clue; me.) Ugh, awesome, I knew 10 hours at the gym a week would have to do something, I really wanna wii fit but Jay has all but banned them, LAME. Like he couldn't get me a freebee. Booo. So apart from like not eating anything fun (Seriously I don't care how much you lie to yourself, we all know salad is a side and not an actual lunch.) and bench presses and SWEAT PANTS my last week has been one long continuous bore, you wanna know why?
Harry Freaking Potter.
No one NO ONE in the world hates those films like I do, since that stupid series got fangirls its been Hell but the last few years the month after one of those stupid films comes out all I ever hear is OMFG MALFOY. No, NOT
. I don't even freaking look like him I'm just blond! Oh my Godddddd stop it, stupid wizard films, and like people will ask me when I'm going back to Hogwarts and laugh so so hard, like it's the most original freaking thing anyone has ever said, and I just have to smile and laugh along, and it's even worse if someone actually thinks I'm Tom Felton (Which, btw, is getting ridic; I'm 6'2", and almost THIRTY, fuck OFF.) then I either just have to sign their stuff and hope for the best or be like the biggest disappointment EVER. This would be so much easier if my ACTUAL GENUINE FACE wasn't EVERYWHERE just now cause of my (lol, my) Dior campaign? Look;
Now I don't expect to be stopped and get 'Omg you're that guy from bus shelters' etc because firstly that would be so freaking DEPRESSING and secondly the only time I've ever learned a models face from an ad was when Travis Fimmel
was doing Crave for CK because UNF he is so unbelievably rammable and he has like this 30 foot poster up in NY and I was gonna try the segment that was just his nipple, or his belly button and just like decorate an entire wall with it- ANYWAY! Like that doesn't bother me BUT BUT BUT what if people think that's Tom Felton? Like I don't look ANYTHING like Tom Felton this is so much bullshit. I hate those freaking films.
MY NAME IS TIM. And I swear Jonny- you call me Malfoy one more time this week you are getting a dead arm, I'm a lot tougher than I look and I've not had carbs in five days- do NOT piss me off sweetie.
What else needs to gtfo, oh, yeah, HEAT. Like 1) SHUT UP you don't even know 2) I DIDN'T EVEN GET
DUMPED- I think there has to be a relationship to begin with, DUH 3) Shut up all over again. God, get a grip. Why does it even matter? Obviously our A lister's need to pick up the slack if they're wasting their time on me cause for serious I play MONOPOLY and cook stir fry and read Miffy books, its like the most unscandolous existence ever- except yeah I did drop some pills on friday and got really
messy but that was in the HOUSE. Well it was until we had to go to tesco to buy raspberries or some other thing, idek what he's about sometimes, but we didn't cause too much distress, Like I didn't even do anything it's all him. Anyway Angel delight totally comes out of fabric, I should know.
Annnnd yeah I think I'm done for the year on the old Job front, does anyone fancy hiring me to look pretty somewhere? Like I can look pretty and I can also play recorder really seriously shockingly well, and um there's a thing I can do with a cherry stem but that depends what sort of thing you want me for. My winter collection spread is out soon in Vogue or ID, idk I wasn't listening, so you know... buy some clothes I wear or something, let them know I sent you :P I'm gonna have to go out loads come December in basically nothing so I get some Spring collection (Come onnnnn Perfume ad, please please please) which is bogus but to Hell with it I've never had a break in a season and I'm not starting it now. I'm already dreading June omg.
I think I'm gonna have to go up to Brum soon. Tbh I'd rather shoot myself in the face but Christmas. Weves. I'm missing out on Thanksgiving (I'll be having a Niçoise salad. On thanksgiving. Fml) so now I really don't care about festivities. If I had any clue about Jew things I'd do something for Jo for Hanukkah
. What do you do for Hanukkah? Should I get him one of those little hats because... Like just take a minute to think about it then you'll see why I really should.
That's all that's gone on for me, borrring but a few more weeks in and I'll be properly over trying to shape up and then I'm going out and getting so drunk I can't even tell you, and I' gonna like order 50 burgers and you can all just sit there in horror and see just how much I can put away and it's going to be FABULOUS.
Omggg what a week, and it's only Monday- doomed doomed doomed. But! It's all ok really because lookie at this (Ppft shut up like you wouldn't have hot pink bedsheets given the option, also; how cute is my piggy bank? totes totes cute.)